


This was a mistake

by Chatlote



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Clowns, Established Relationship, Except he knows the answer, Gen, I'm Sorry, Keith wondering why the hell he decided to date this fool, M/M, Mentions of robbery as a joke
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-12
Updated: 2017-09-12
Packaged: 2018-12-27 04:40:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,307
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12073707
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chatlote/pseuds/Chatlote
Summary: “My mom once beat up a robber.” Lance had said while they were sitting together on the couch.Keith hummed in thought. “Thats not a dumb story though, that’s pretty badass.”“Yeah it kind of is, but the thing is that the guy was dressed up as a clown, an actual clown, make up and all.”“What the hell.”Or: Lance convinces Keith to dress up as a clown.





	This was a mistake

**Author's Note:**

> me starting to write this a joke: if this reaches 1k words I will post it on AO3  
> me realizing I am bad at measuring the sizes of my works: fuck
> 
> anyway this is based on [this post](https://softklanceday.tumblr.com/post/165202956046/31-soft-klance-of-the-day-they-have-this) I made

"Why was he dressed like a clown though?" Keith asks, honestly curious.

He and Lance are sitting together on the empty living room. Lance is on his lap with his arms around him and Keith can't help but notice how light Lance was. It's comforting to be close like this, it unbearably reminded each other of how they weren't alone. Especially on times like these where Lance was feeling homesick. He has been narrating about a silly story of how his mother had once beat up a robber dressed like a clown.

"Many people are terrified of clowns, and the makeup was truly awful so I assume it was to scare us?" Lance replies with a light shrug.

"Okay but like, wouldn't a black outfit work better to sneak inside?"

"Keith I have no idea, I didn't ask the guy if he had a PHD in robbing people. Do you have one, Keith? Were you trying to become a robber?  Do you know how the robbing life works? Maybe the guy was tired of the robber stereotype and wanted things to change!"

Keith chuckles half amused, Lance ramblings always end up in quite a few interesting places. Then Lance eyes are lighting up, just like they usually do before he comes up with an awful idea. "Oh no."

"Keith we could become robbers together! Like-"

"-No." Keith interrupts almost immediately, only because he knows that it won't matter and Lance will certainly explain his full train of thought.

"Just hear me out!" There he goes. "I have total amazing social skills to keep people distracted and you have like, your whole emo aura that makes people look away because it's just sad to look at another victim of the Black Parade."

Keith smirks, not even feeling offended. "You still look at me though."

"I am strong, loving and caring." Lance says placing a hand on his chest dramatically.

"And because you think I am pretty." Keith points out, and smiling as Lance doesn't attempt at arguing back. Going back to the topic, he decides to indulge Lance in his crazy ideas, once again. "So do you want us to dress up as clowns too?"

Lance eyes go wide, just as his smile, Keith thinks he might go blind because of how radiant it is. He should ask Pidge to try and create sunglasses. "Would you do that?" Lance voice goes high pitched, he is basically begging Keith to say yes.

He wants to refuse, he really does, it's a stupid awful idea, possibly the worst idea of the century, scratch that, totally the worst idea of the century. He hums in thought though as he stares at Lance, honestly considering his choices. It's so hard to say no to Lance when he gets like this. "If you dress up too, I might."

Lance gasps, clearly surprised but also pleased, and then turns into a giggling fit as he presses his face against Keith neck and tightens his hold. Keith can't help himself when he starts laughing too, his cheeks flushing because everything about this situation somehow just makes him think that he truly has it bad for this boy.

"I love you so much." Lance mumbles against his neck, happiness basically dripping from his voice.

"Love you too." Keith replies with a smile so wide that his cheeks are hurting.

\---

Keith was one hundred percent certain that Lance had forgotten this whole conversation, and Keith realizes he was a fool for thinking that. For Lance would never pass up and opportunity to make himself look like a complete fool.

He honestly can't believe his eyes when Lance walks into his- well their room at this point, with a pair of flashy over sized clothes and a bunch of containers that seem to have white, black and red paint inside.

He also can't believe when he actually lets Lance sit down in front of him and cover his face in all those weird paints and then doing the same for himself with the help of something similar to a hand mirror.

And he can't believe either when Lance manages to make him wear one of the awful outfits he brought with him.

When they are finished and Keith is staring at Lance, does Keith finally regain a bit of his senses to realize their current situation.

Lance managed to put the two of them in clown outfits... in space.

"Wait, where did you even get all this?" He frowns looking at himself, especially at his hands covered in white gloves, he already misses his normal gloves, his poor fingers being suffocated by silk.

"Coran." Lance chirps happily as he admires his work on both of them. "I told him it was a human tradition a while back and he helped me organize. "

"Oh." Well that was one question answered. "And why exactly are we wearing this? There isn't exactly anyone to rob in space, also that would be wrong and illegal."

"Dear Keith, that's where you are very very wrong." Lance puts a arm around his shoulder pulling them closer. "We have the perfect victim right here, in this spaceship" He pauses as if trying to create some kind of suspension. "Pidge."

Keith blinks. "What exactly can we steal from Pidge?"

"My precious alien phone." Lance says, with an exaggerated sad tone as he wipes away a tear that isn't there.

"Doesn't that device belong to Pidge though? They made it right?"

Lance waves a hand in front of him, dismissing the facts. God, how did he end up with a boyfriend this extra. "That is besides the point! The point is that we have a treasure we need to get back and the perfect costumes for it!"

"I can't believe I agreed to this." Okay, so in a way he kind of can, if it meant to see Lance smiling when he is feeling down, Keith would basically agree to anything.

"It's because you love me, now come on Space Clowns have work to do." Lance starts pushing him towards the door.

"Never call us that again."

 

They are sneaking, well only Lance is sneaking, Keith refuses to do the same and is walking normally behind him. Either way, they are going through the hallways when they finally get spotted by someone, Shiro. Keith freezes in place as they share eye contact, expecting some kind of reaction, starting to feel like this really was an awful idea and feeling a bit too conscious.

Shiro looks at them up and down, then he just sighs and keeps walking. "I am not even going to ask." He mumbles more to himself than to them.

"We are robbing Pidge!" Lance snickers in a yelled whisper.

Keith sees in silence Shiro pass by them and wave a hand in the air. "I said I wasn't asking." Shiro says louder as he leaves their field of vision.

 

"Okay so here is the plan I will go in and speak to them, keeping them distracted, while you sneak behind and get the phone." Lance explains after they find out that Pidge is with Hunk in the living room. They are currently standing outside the door and can hear both of them speaking inside.

Keith is completely sure this is an awful plan that had no chances of working, and he is also too tired to argue so he replies with "Sure."

Not wasting a moment, Lance is slipping inside and before Keith can even think of attempting to play his part, a shriek and a loud thud echo through the walls.

Keith quickly peers inside, worried. He finds Lance holding his face and a very worried Hunk beside him apologizing nonstop. "Man, you should know I am terrified of clowns why the hell are you dressed like one?" Lance only laughs in reply, but the gesture must hurt because he winces afterwards. "Wait here, I will go get you some frozen goo."

Hunk quickly leaves the room running and Keith is just as quickly next to Lance. "You okay?"

Lance raises himself and pulls his hand down, to squint at Keith as if he was somehow guilty of this turn of events. "I am great, however, I am wondering why you aren't following our plan? Also concerned this might leave a bruise and ruin my beautiful face." Keith rolls his eyes. Yeah, Lance is fine.

Keith looks over to Pidge who had been silent the whole time, to find them with their phone turned to him and a huge grin on their face as they snap photos nonstop. "I am so glad you started dating Lance."

Seeing what game Pidge wants to play, Keith speaks up with a grin. "Unfortunately for you, when I started dating him I also threw any dignity I had away so you can't really blackmail me with those."

"Hey!" Lance pipes up, offended.

"Damn it." Pidge said as they dropped the phone. Then looked at them up and down, thoughtfully. "Seriously though, why are you two dressed like literal clowns."

"He wants the phone back." Keith replied nonchalantly pointing at Lance.

Pidge grins dangerously, the kind of grin Keith images on a wild animal looking at their prey. "Just so he can fill it with images of you?"

Keith quickly turns to Lance. "You do what?!"

"I do not!" Lance raises his hand defensively, "Well okay, I took a few because you looked really cute, I am sorry."

Keith feels the heat creeping into his face, he supposes the good side of all this is that the paint won't show his blushing. "You don't have to apologize but you could have told me."

Pidge is still staring at them, fairly amused, though they look at Lance with a frown. "I still don't get it though, I told you I was going to make you your own phone anyway?"

"Stealing yours sounded like more fun!"

"You got yourself hurt for nothing." Keith points out, still somewhat concerned considering Hunk strength.

"Unexpected events happen on robberies! This was all just part of the experience, now I know how the man who robbed my house felt and have become wiser."

Keith raises an eyebrow, not convinced. "What did you learn exactly?"

"That this is an awful costume to rob people with." Lance states as a matter of fact, looking proud of the discovery somehow.

Keith resists the urge to face palm himself, simply because of the makeup, while Pidge bursts out laughing.

 

All Keith hopes is that nothing else happens as they leave the room and start heading back, he has had enough of 'Lance Eventful and Disastrous Adventures' for the rest of the week, if not month. However the world hates him, a lot, because they cross paths with yet another person, and possibly the worst person to find them in this state.

Allura.

As he sees her face light up in interest and delight, Keith is already trying to prepare himself mentally for what will happen next.

 

Shortly after, everyone is gathered on the Bridge. Everyone except Hunk, who refuses to participate in any of the 'Clown Activities' as Lance called them.

Speaking of Lance he is now putting his hands to work and slowly placing more and more paint on Allura face slowly turning the beautiful princess into... a clown.

Coran is on the side chatting excitedly as he asks more about 'Clown Traditions' to Pidge and Lance, who reply with the same vigor. Pidge is also busy snapping photos at Allura, Lance and Keith, because according to them 'this is a moment they need to remember forever.'

Shiro is besides Keith and to say he looks tired would be saying little, and Keith is pretty sure the only reason why he is still here is to make sure Lance stays in line.

Keith finds comfort that someone else is suffering. Okay if he is being honest, maybe he isn't having as bad of a time as Shiro, because Keith is a fool and he can't help but smile at the way Lance keeps giggling as he keeps on working.

Shiro mumbles besides him, frowning at the scene in front of him. "Why clowns though? Why not mimes? Like even mimes would be less terrifying to look at." 

Keith smiles and shrugs. "It's a long story."

"Okaaay, I think I am going to join Hunk in the kitchen." Shiro announces as he makes his way towards the exit, officially giving up on trying to keep up with this tale.

 

After all is said and done, they do manage to reach their room without further events.

And as soon as the door closes, Lance is throwing himself around Keith, laughing as he buries his head on Keith shoulder, the sound vibrates through Keith and he is smiling. He still isn't sure whether he hated or loved this day.

"This was the best day of my life since I have been thrown into an intergalactic war." Lance says, holding him closer.

"I thought that was the day where we went to the planet that basically looked like a huge beach."

"Don't ruin the moment." Lance scolds but there was still a smile in his face. He really needs those sunglasses.

Then Keith notices that Lance is slowly leaning towards him, with his face full of white and red paint. The sight is horrifying and looks straight out of a nightmare, suddenly Keith understand Hunk to a deeper spiritual level.

 He puts his hand over Lance lips without a second of hesitation. "No, nope, not doing that. I'm done, this is too far and I can't do this anymore. I won't kiss you like this. We are washing off right now and then we are coming back here and I will kiss you until I can forget that today ever happened."

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> this was a mistake but I hope you enjoyed
> 
> (this probably wouldnt have existed if it wasn't for my chats with Eli, follow the gremlin: [here](http://gay-nmede.tumblr.com/) )


End file.
